Filling the void

So for the past year, I've been single. Before that I ended up dating one of my lovely guy friend for close to six or seven months, on and off. We had met while I was dating our mutual friend, and though he caught my attention five years ago, nothing ever really happened. We had kissed a few times due to drunk summer nights, but for the most part would only see each other during parties at the shore. We had gone to college ~six hours away, and just never really had thought of things between us. He had told me numerous times that he was interested in me, and finally after six months recovering from B, I thought it was time to move on. MF had been one to comment on facebook posts, so instead of just rolling my eyes at his latest common, I texted him. We became quite the text message buddies for lack of better term, and within days felt with if I hadn't texted him within five minutes. We had lengthy conversations ranging from best pizza (food being a mutual love of ours) to why there are sick and starving kids in Haiti. At this time, we were still about 2 hours from each other, both living at home with our parents, and had yet to get together well physically. We both had friends in Phlly, and quickly mde plans to meet up, which of course led to long-awaited yet fantastic bedroom time, after going out. I felt 17 again, and it was terribly frustrating. Since MF's parents were terribly strict lutherans, and I lived in a menagerie of cats, dogs, and siblings, alone time was rare. It wasn't even the point of doing the actual deed, but even close cuddle time was far and few between. It was difficult, yet I knew hat as summer approached, it would get incredibly better for he was getting a shore house with friends, 20 minutes from where I lived. I noticed though quickly, how childish MF was. Night after night, he would get incredibly drunk, losing all control of himself. Though nights between the two of us were sober, whenever around friends he could not control himself. For gods sake, the child was on his 10th or so license replacement. Thankfully he was a nice, friendly drunk, but at the same time, I felt more like his mother then anything else.Though an incredible business man by day, by night I wanted to have a child leash on him. He would get lost at bars, walk home and go missing, and just be a handful. He was no better then a 3 year old toddler. I thought things would change (idiotically) but to this day, the guy has not changed and probably will not for a long time. It was hard to break free from that. MF was amazing besides that, but after repeated attempts to stay sober or to grow up, nothing changed. I should have realized that he also had committment issues, for he never had a girlfriend before me. Not one serious girlfriend at 25. Though he was friends or friendly with everyone in sight it seemed, he could never settle down. It should have stuck out like a clear warning sign above WARNING NOT RELATIONSHIP MATERIAL!BUYER. BEWARE, but finding the good in everyone, I stuck it out. Things ended, for the best, and still friendly. The last year being single though... That's another story, and an update of online daing once again.